Michelle Myers
14 min read ⭑
“There’s a drastic difference between what God’s Word says and what the world wants us to believe. On any given week, you’re listening to your pastor’s sermon and the podcast your boss sent you. And over time, you find yourself simultaneously striving to be everything God has called you to be and everything the world expects you to be.”
QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT
There’s much more to food than palate and preference. How does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind the web bio?
If you lived in Asheville, North Carolina, you would understand why this question is so hard to answer! Asheville is a foodie town, and I'm married to a man who claims Gary Chapman missed food as one of the love languages.
Don't get me wrong: I want to eat well, too. But for me, meals are less about what's on my plate (unless we're talking about dessert!) and more about who is around the table.
So that's why this one dinner at the Grove Park Inn is one I will never forget.
"They want us to what?" my husband, James, asked me.
"They want us to meet them at the Grove Park Inn for dinner!" I repeated myself, just slowly enough for my sarcasm to show without crossing the line to disrespectful.
"Isn't it their anniversary weekend? Isn't that why they're here?" he asked.
"It is," I said. "But they invited us, and I want to go!"
"But you realize that, other than a handshake in the lobby at church, we've never really spent any time with them. Don't you think crashing their anniversary weekend might be skipping a few steps?"
"Maybe," I agreed reluctantly. "But they still invited us, and I really think we should go."
James shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, make it happen."
And that's how we got to know Clayton and Sharie King. Over the years, we'd heard both of them speak from a stage, learned so much from them, and had so much respect for them. And after recording a podcast with Sharie, she invited us to crash their anniversary weekend with a double date.
We sat around the table until almost midnight. It ended up being a six-hour meal. We laughed until we cried. When the meal started, we were mere acquaintances, but by the time we left the table, we were best friends. We now double-date as often as we can get together.
I couldn't tell you a single thing I ate that night, which is probably a crime to anyone reading this who knows Asheville. But I'm not sure any other meal will be able to top that one.
CoWomen; Unsplash
QUESTION #2: REVEAL
We’ve all got quirky proclivities and out-of-the-way interests. So what are yours? What so-called "nonspiritual" activities do you love and help you find spiritual renewal?
I instantly relax when I'm around water. Up through my 20s, I thought my love for water required a trip to the beach—which I still will never turn down!
But then I randomly hopped on a paddleboard for the first time when we visited friends who had a boat. And in less than two minutes, I was hooked.
Something about the combination of gliding across the water, feeling wrapped in the warm sun, the rippling sound the water makes, and the beautiful views (I get bonus beauty since all of the lakes near me are also surrounded by mountains!) calms me down even though my heart rate is up. If you've never tried it before, it's a serious cardio workout.
Life just seems to slow down on a paddleboard. Now, lake days are a regular part of our summer rhythm as a
family. We've got a pretty good routine of scouting out the lake, pulling the kids for a few rounds on the tube, and when all three of my kids and my husband are ready for their first snack, I hop on the paddleboard.
Sometimes, one of the kids goes for a ride with me, but other times, I go solo. Both are fun. I either get to laugh—because you know I'm going to splash them with the paddle and they're going to try to tip us over—or I get to pray.
Over the last two years, I've had some of my most honest and raw conversations with God in the middle of the lake on a paddleboard. Surrounded by his creation, it’s just me and him. No distractions.
So paddleboard prayer. It's my thing.
QUESTION #3: CONFESS
Every superhero has a weakness. Every human, too. We're just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re broken and in this thing together. So what’s your kryptonite and how do you hide it?
“Learning the difference between a concern and a responsibility may save your ministry, your family, and your sanity.” —Wayne Cordeiro, Leading on Empty
Reading that sentence a few years ago was the gut punch I needed. I'm a fixer, through and through. And sometimes, that's a good thing. But other times, it's not.
Sometimes, for example, people don't tell you a problem just so you'll solve it. They just want you to listen. And jumping into solution mode instead of simply showing care only adds to their pain.
But the absolute hardest moments for me are when someone I love is completely oblivious to their problem. No matter how obvious it appears to everyone else, they
continue diving deeper into a toxic relationship, addiction, or some form of moral compromise. I know in ministry and in life, these situations happen more often than any of us prefer. And for years, I not only took responsibility for my own mistakes and shortcomings—and I have plenty of those!—but I also carried the weight of responsibility for those close to me as well. I never drew the line between something that's a concern and something that's my responsibility. And living that way kept me operating in a perpetual state of burnout and overwork.
Left to myself, this is still my default mode and gut reaction. I have to make serious efforts to move something in my mind from my responsibility to my concern. To lay down my pride (because that's the root issue for all fixers) and pursue humility so I can actively trust God and recognize my limits.
QUESTION #4: FIRE UP
Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your obsession? And why should it be ours?
The workplace is a unique intersection for Christians. On the one hand, it's likely the most underutilized mission field believers occupy every day. But it's also the place that probably creates the most tension in believers' lives between Christ and culture.
What do I mean by tension? Well, there’s a drastic difference between what God's Word says and what the world wants us to believe. On any given week, you're listening to your pastor's sermon and the podcast your boss sent you. You're reading your Bible and a new personal development book. And over time, you find yourself simultaneously striving to be everything God has called you to be and everything the world expects you to be. And the world tries to sell it to us as "life balance," but that's not balance. That's bondage. And it’s far too common.
So almost a decade ago, three friends and I decided to hop on Google Hangout (pre-Zoom days) weekly and talk about the tension we felt. We opened our Bibles and talked about what God was showing us.
Two things we realized quickly:
1. Talking about the tension made it feel a lot less tense.
2. Everything we need to know, God has already said. Using Scripture as our home base simplifies how to filter through the rest of the world's noise.
We didn't know it then, but those weekly meetings were the beginning of the nonprofit now known as She Works His Way, a discipleship community for working women. And while I'm super grateful for the resources and content we put out as a ministry, the absolute best part about this network is the women you get to meet.
I've found that working women who love Jesus spend a lot of their time feeling misunderstood. It's not uncommon to go from being the only believer in your workplace to being the only working woman in the Bible study at church. When you come inside the swHw network, you're instantly connected to women who get you, are for you, and navigate the same tension you do on a regular basis.
QUESTION #5: BOOST
Cashiers, CEOs, contractors, or customer service reps, we all need grace flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it's God when it happens?
I get to serve as the co-founder of She Works His Way with my best friend, Somer Phoebus. Cue all the Michael and Jim jokes from The Office, but we truly do co-lead the ministry, and we're all better for it. Full disclosure, our roles don't even look terribly different in that the majority of my responsibilities have to do with the big picture while Somer handles more of the day-to-day operations. (I'm certain I'm going to regret going public with that analogy!)
But one of the ways we see God's power showing off is how he continues to stir our hearts and weave our gifts together in ways that only he can. We live states apart and only get to see each other three or four times a year. And while we have the most important things in common, we truly couldn't be more different from one another. If the world were to look at our résumés, personalities, preferences, and interests, I doubt anyone would conclude that we'd make good business partners, let alone best friends.
Even though you might think our differences would pull us apart, they’re what make the ministry stronger because they allow what unifies us (Jesus!) to be on full display.
I've lost count of how many times over the years we come together for a conversation and God has put the same topic or the same direction on both of our hearts. Or I'll come to a meeting with a strong "why" we should do something and Somer comes to that meeting with a "how" we can do something, and the two perfectly align. Whatever number we're up to now, it clearly defies human logic and serves as evidence that God is powerfully at work.
QUESTION #6: inspire
Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied actions that open our hearts to the presence of God. So, spill it, which spiritual practice is workin' best for you right now?
I think my heart has a closer connection to my hand than to my mouth, so I learn the most about what God is teaching me by journaling right after I read the Bible. I used to try to get through reading the entire Bible in a year, and while there's certainly nothing wrong with that, I would sometimes find myself reading more and retaining less. I find that, for me, studying requires a slower pace. So each morning, I read less than I used to, but I remember more.
I wake up early (an hour and a half before the first kid comes downstairs), fix myself a quick breakfast, and then sit down in my office with my Bible and a hot cup of coffee.
I read, underline, and jot a few notes in the margins as I go, then I pull out my swHw Bible Journal that has four simple prompts. (You can get one, or you can simply use the following prompts in any notebook!)
Study: Look for attributes of God, a promise to trust, a command to obey, a sin to avoid, truth to believe, example to learn from, something that stands out in a fresh way, etc.
Remember: The main idea I need to remind myself and others of based on what I read.
Pray: What conversation with God do I need to have based on what I read? (praise, confession, ask, etc.)
Do: How can I live out what I read? Choose an action step.
I know studying God's Word can sound intimidating. So here are a few things I wish someone had told me when I felt unequipped to dig into God's Word on my own:
1. Full faith is the goal, not full understanding. If full understanding was possible, faith wouldn't be required. Following God would simply be about knowledge. But because God’s ways and thoughts are infinitely higher than ours (see Isaiah 55:8-9), we can expect there to be pieces of God and subsequently, his Word, that we will not be able to fully understand. Hebrews 11:1 defines faith as "the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen" (ESV). So give yourself grace for your human limits in the parts you don't understand, and let your faith carry you to trust in our God, who always keeps his promises.
2. God is big enough to handle your doubts. You are allowed to have questions when you read. You're even allowed to have doubts, but you must be honest in your doubt. Honest doubt says, "God, I am open for you to reveal this to me. Even if I don't get a clear answer or get the answer that I like or want, I'm bringing my doubts to you because you're big enough to handle them.”
3. Every word is true. It's all too common for some to claim belief in the parts of the Bible that make sense and dismiss the more difficult passages to understand. Again, full understanding is not the point—full faith is. Before you begin reading, activate your faith and decide every word is true.
QUESTION #7: FOCUS
Our email subscribers get free ebooks featuring our favorite resources—lots of things that have truly impacted our faith lives. But you know about some really great stuff, too. What are three resources that have impacted you?
1. Multiply: Disciples Making Disciples by Francis Chan.
It was really hard to narrow down my favorite Francis Chan books to just one because, truthfully, I think you should read them all! But I think this is the one that I have taken to heart the most. We have become an addition-focused society. If you want to grow a cause or a business, you add more customers. And you add more customers by adding more followers. And if we're not careful, it's easy to think ministry should look the same. But if we just continue adding "consumers" instead of multiplying to make disciples, we're not really obeying the Great Commission.
2) Leading on Empty by Wayne Cordeiro.
I already mentioned this book once in this article, but I'm telling you, if you lead in any capacity, it's a must-read. Even if you don't think you're anywhere near burnout, you might be shocked to realize how close you
actually are. I thought I was reading this book preventatively, but reading this at the end of 2019 was the catalyst of a personal turning point I didn't even know I needed. Wayne Cordeiro is a pastor, and he writes like one. Every chapter is spiritually sound, insanely practical, and keeps a conversational tone with an incredible amount of humility, truth, and love. I can't recommend it enough.
3) The Elisabeth Elliot Podcast.
I go on walks in my neighborhood several times per week, and it's not uncommon for this to be my podcast of choice as I walk. Several of Elisabeth Elliot's books (Let Me Be a Woman, Discipline: The Glad Surrender, Suffering Is Never for Nothing) have had a profound impact on me, and these recordings of her teachings have been such a blessing to find. I listen to them at 1.5 speed, and it feels like I'm walking with a really wise friend and mentor.
We all have things we cling to to survive (or thrive) in tough times. Name one resource you’ve found indispensable in this current season—and tell us what it's done for you.
I love the Dwell App!
When it comes to reading, I already shared I prefer to do a deeper study on a smaller passage of Scripture, but I also love to listen to Scripture as a story. You can listen to whole books of the Bible or choose a theme (for example, “God Is Faithful”), which reads several different Scriptures back to back on that topic. Having a portable and audio version that can accompany me throughout my day truly helps me to meditate on God's Word continually instead of just marking my Bible reading time as done in the morning as I would any other task on a list.
In addition to my deep study, listening to longer passages reminds me that all of Scripture is really one story about one Person: Jesus. It helps me see the big picture regularly. I'm always amazed by the overlap and connection between what I'm reading in the morning and what I'm listening to throughout the day.
My favorite time to listen is while I'm driving to pick my kids up from school. This has been the biggest game-changer for me as I transition between my workday and family time. I found that when I was scrambling to finish up a work call before the kids got in the car or arriving early to school so I could clean out my email inbox one more time, I was starting my afternoon frustrated. So listening to Scripture on my 20-minute drive is the perfect way to end the workday and start family time.
QUESTION #8: dream
God is continually stirring new things in each of us. So give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?
Next year, we are launching a new sub-group of our shWh Network called Local Leaders. It's for the woman who is ready to bring the same conversations we have inside our ministry to her church, city, workplace, or local group of friends. We have no expectations in terms of group size or venue. The only requirement is that she feels called to teach the Bible and have in-person, gospel-centered conversations with other women.
There's so much "ministry" right now that's mass produced. And I'm not saying that's wrong in and of itself. But good content alone isn't enough to help people grow in their walks with the Lord.
Think about it. If good content were all that was needed for Christians to better own their faith, don't you think the world would look a little holier than it does?
We have access to nearly every pastor's weekly sermon via podcast or YouTube. Add in the social media accounts, blogs, and resources put out by Christian leaders and nonprofit ministries. Good, gospel-centered content is great, but alone, it won't make disciples.
If we want to share the mission God has called us to with more women (and we do!), the best way to do that isn't by adding more followers.
We need more leaders.
Francis Chan put it this way: "But all too often, the message to the masses is robbed of its power because it's not accompanied by a life that reflects its power."
I am so excited to see what happens when these small groups begin forming in churches, homes, breakrooms, and coffee shops and when women get to hear a powerful message from God's Word and get to be in community with other women who are aiming to live it out together. Just sitting here typing about it makes me want to spin circles in my desk chair.
We have been doing this work for a decade, but based on where we're headed, I truly believe God is just getting started.
For a long time, the workplace was considered a man’s domain—and some people still see it that way. But is that perception accurate? Not quite. Nowadays, the majority of women participate in the labor force (57.4% in 2019), and in doing so, many of them may face gender bias or sexual harassment while simply trying to succeed at their jobs.
But for Christian women, that tension is even higher. As Michelle mentioned earlier, many of these women “go from being the only believer in [their] workplace to being the only working woman in the Bible study at church.”
That’s why Michelle works so hard to provide for these women a safe place of community through She Works His Way. The question is: How can we do the same thing—or something similar—in our local churches?
Michelle had no idea what started as a Google Hangout at 5 a.m. with three friends would one day result in the title of founder of She Works His Way. But that meeting between friends ended up growing into a nonprofit discipleship community for working women. The ministry includes a book of the same title, an online network, in-person events, and a range of teachings and resources that are equally spiritual and practical. Michelle and her husband, James—the central discipleship pastor at Biltmore Church—live in Asheville, North Carolina, with their three children, Noah, Cole, and Shea.